Tag: real

Thanks for listening guys

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…. “I feel like I’m living on the edge right now because I only have like one podcast scheduled to go out” ….

…. “ . . . They are so old when I listen to those I am like {god damn that’s an annoying b****}” ….

…. “. . .  I’m not postings that one, that one is so lame” ….

…. “um… so…….” ….

…. “I thought this is kinda cool actually” ….

…. “It means that my podcast and blog posts and everything with my instagram posts and all that . . . {because it’s happening in the same few days} it’s  like in real time” ….

…. “A lot of the old podcasts were like months old, or weeks old and now I’m at couple hours old type shit” ….

…. “So this shit is getting real” …. 

…. “Um. . . Sure its nice to have 7 podcasts scheduled for the week but uh. . . It’s hard. . . I’m working a lot and uh. . .yeah. . .” ….

…. “I don’t even want to go into the iPhone 5c and 6 archives. . . Or the iPads. . .um. .  ” ….

…. “I ain’t prepared to listen to those, they in the bad parts of life” ….

…. “. . . This is too boring, this is too sad” ….

…. “Not much of those get out” ….

…. “I feel like I’m eventually gonna run out and then I’m going to have. . .I’m gonna miss a day. . .and that’s crazy” ….

…. “I don’t know what happened, I just started this podcast so intuitively and uh . . . With no f****** plan but from day one the plan was, upload one a day and now I’m like shit. . . It’s getting scary” ….

…. “I’m getting scared, if I miss a day I’m gonna feel super disappointed” ….

…. “How hard can it be to upload a rant a day they are like 2 minutes long!? . . .  I can do it!. . .  I got this!. . .” ….

…. “I’m doing what I do and I like it and uh well see what happens and don’t beat me up if skip a day cuz I get busy. . . K? Thanks! Thanks for listening guys” ….

Peed in the jacuzzi

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…. “I was thinking like what am I going to talk about? I don’t know what to talk about” ….

…. “Let’s f****** do story time and let’s start at the beginning” ….

…. “I have a really bad memory. . . We’ll get to that later but. . .” ….

…. “Trying to think of the oldest memory I have of when I was little. . .” ….

…. “. . . And this one is so dumb but we’re starting at the beginning so here goes” ….

…. “Um. . . I was probably about six I think. . .  I don’t know” ….

…. “I was young and we were all in the hot tub” ….

…. “. . .  Six. . . Ten. . . Whatever. . .” ….

…. “. . . And I peed” …. {shhhh}

….  “I peed in the hot tub, the jacuzzi or whatever” …. 

…. “I thought. . .  no like I’m six. . . It’s ok. . . it’s ok  I have to pee. . . I don’t want to get out. . . Everyone’s going to look at me. . .” ….

…. “My Uncle. . . Whatever ever the guy is. . . My grandma’s brother. . . I’ll call him my uncle cuz I don’t think he is by grandpa. . .he is not my grandpa. . .” ….

…. “Um. . .he. . .uh. . .he was like {WHO PEED IN THE THE JACUZZI}” ….

…. “And I was like . . . Grew up my whole life so f****** mortified. . .” ….

…. “So mortified that ummm. . .  That he knew. . . Somebody peed. . . And maybe he could spot my poker face, you know?” ….

…. “At six years old I was like. . .{does he know its me, or do I have a good poker face, I don’t know I’m six! F***!}”  ….

…. “NOW. . . As an adult I think about this and I’m like {come on I’m a six year old!?}” ….

…. “How much pee did I have?” ….

…. “Like an ounce of tequila? “ ….

…. “How did this uncle thing know that I peed in the pool and I’m like NO!” ….

…. “I don’t think that’s possible. . .just one six year old. . . But there was probably multiples of us in there” ….

…. “So I think we must of all f****** peed in the jacuzzi so it was concentrated enough to so that my . . . Uncle man knew we peed in the pool” ….

All I want in a relationship

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…. “If it sounds like I’m peeing. . . . I’M NOT” ….

…. “I’m just brewing some tea . . . So don’t get on my case about that” ….

…. “After a long day at work and standing . . . My f****** feet, ankles, knees, back, arms, everything just hurts” …. 

…. “So all I want is just someone who’s gonna rub my feet and head and everything in between” …. 

…. “And um. . . Cuddle and not say a word” ….

…. “Like that’s all I want in life, and if I ain’t getting that from someone why the f*** am I in a relationship with you?” ….

No one is screwing me over anymore

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…. “I definitely wasn’t always the person who didn’t give a s*** about anything or what people do, say or think about me” ….

…. “I was definitely the opposite of that for the majority of my life” ….

…. “And unfortunately it was like my last {kind of} relationship, if you want to call it that, that uh really made me snap and just say f*** it ” ….

…. “I’m so f****** done!” ….

…. “Because. . .like. . .this m***** f***** like assaulted me and manipulated me” ….

…. “It was so fucking bad and I didn’t even know it till like a few weeks in what the f*** was going on and what had happened actually ” ….

…. “I was so f****** like freaked out and like what the f***?! How did this happen? ” ….

…. “And um, like I’m trying to get rid of this m***** f***** and trying to be nice about it” ….

…. “I realize, like yeah, me being nice and trying not to hurt other people was reallly really f****** me over” ….

…. “And finally I had to tell this m***** f*****, don’t f***** contact me” ….

…. “And it was like weird, it was super hard and strange and it felt good” ….

…. “It felt so f****** good that like I really just snapped into this other side of it where I’m like f*** that feels good to just not give a f***” ….

 …. “I’m not taking care of your feelings anymore its time to take care of my feeling” ….

…. “I’m still a good person. . . . But. . . No one is f****** me over anymore” ….

Butterfly filter lips

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…. “God damn these f****** internet filters, like they be getting me” ….

…. “I done even like that the f***** butterflies are there” ….

…. “I just like the tones that it tones my picture to, it smoother my skin to look like a babies ass, um like it gives what looks like cool eyelashes or something, and it lightens my eyes . . . AND THEY ARE DIFFERENT COLORS” ….

…. “F*** yeah, of course I like that shit” ….

…. “But um IDGAF about the butterflies but they are there” ….

…. “Cheaper than getting contacts” ….

…. “Wait wait wait. . . I thought your lips were bigger than that b****” ….

…. “You realize all these filters be plumping your lips {laughs} and giving you f****** lip injections” ….

…. “You didn’t even know. . .  Now you tripping out in the mirror like where the f*** my lips go?” ….

I regret almost all the people I’ve slept with

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…. “I’ve had a lot of bad sexual experiences in my life and you can pretty much start at the beginning” ….

…. “Let’s say like junior high school days already off to a bad bad start” ….

…. “Let’s just say I don’t remember anyone teaching me about the birds and the bees or about self worth or self esteem or like none of that!” ….

…. “I was just trying to think, out of the people I’ve slept with, um sadly I think its more than a few” ….

…. “But what is everyone else’s few?!” ….

…. “There’s not very many that I’ve slept with that I can be like {I’m really happy I slept with that person} and like that’s bad!” ….

…. “That is sooo bad” ….

 …. “Sex is supposed to be a very intimate thing” ….

…. “I don’t just let nobody f****** in my intimate zone” ….

…. “But I mean. . .  I did . . . but like . .  . I didn’t know this” ….

…. “How many of theses guys? {and we said it was sadly more than a few} how many of them do I really NOT regret having sex with?” …. 

…. “At the moment can only think of like 1 *maybe, kinda, sorta*” …. 

…. “It’s blowing my mind that it is so close to zero out of the “few you know more than a few” guys I’ve slept with and that’s really fucked up” …. 

…. “That’s why I’m fucked up” ….

…. “Like I’ve become this person who really is like craving that intimacy but like just having sex with someone isn’t how I get thate intimacy. . . . . . . . . . . I’ve just realized” ….

…. “Like everyone of those fucking dudes that I regret having sex with which is majority, umm, did I get that intimacy” ….

…. “Like noooo” …. {laughs}

…. “I just ended up. . . like. . . got invaded. . . like no. . . they just invaded me. . . like I wasn’t f****** ready. . . I didn’t know who they are, were, is!” …. 

…. “But I didn’t know so much back then. . . I was so young” ….

…. “I just wanted love. . . I just wanted attention . . . I wanted affection. . . and um that’s how I didn’t get it” …. {laughs}

…. “But I thought I was gonna get it that way” …. 

…. “It didn’t work very well” …. 

Talking honestly to the spy cams

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…. “I’m learning to be so openly honest and just like, I’m not trying to be mean, I definitely come off as nice as possible but I say the truth with no f***** in a nice way!” ….

…. “. . . I know because I am the manager that there are cameras that are listening to us” ….

…. “I’m like you know what? {I f****** love this}” ….

…. “I’m gonna be f****** honest {in the nice way}” ….

…. “I f****** hope they hear it! I DO!” ….

…. “These m****** f****** need to hear this shit” ….

Secretive people are weird

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…. “You know what always like confuses me about people {laughs}” ….

…. “. . . Sometimes we got to get your name, number and email to like check you in for your appointment ” ….

…. “UNDERSTANDABLE” ….

…. “But some of these m***** f******  . . .” ….

…. “They are so f****** like securitive” ….

…. “What is that. . . overly security?!?” …..

…. “I DONT KNOW” ….

…. “Super secretive!” ….

8…. “I’m looking at them and I’m like…. {m***** f***** you look like you just some old man who like in retirement like who’s the f***be checking up on you?!” ….

…. “You think your some big shot?” …

…. “No” ….

…. “I don’t think people care to know what area you live in, like you ain’t that f***** big! STOP!” ….

Do emojis make text more meaningful?

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October 9th 2020

It’s my moms birthday and I’m not big on Facebook affection

I feel like when you say happy birthday on Facebook its to make sure everyone else sees that you said happy birthday to your mom

I refuse to play that game

I tell no one happy birthday on social media.

If your my real friend or part of my life I’ll tell you in person if I can or more likely through text

So now I’m wondering if my happy birthday text to my mom sucked because my mom replied and just said “thanks, love you too”

And I am like, that’s kind of a short reply for me saying “happy birthday, love and miss you so much have the best day”

And she just said “thank you love you too with a heart emoji”

Now it made me think like shit was my happy birthday text bad because I put zero emojis

Zero

Would I have gotten a better response from her if I put all the bday emojis

Would it have been a more meaningful happy birthday text if I put some emojis in it?